"Mrs. Van Dyke, how can I fix my Language Arts grade?'
A seemingly innocent, and well-meaning question. A question I am asked time and time again throughout the school year.
For those of you who don't know, I teach 6th grade and middle school students are exactly who my heart has been designed to serve. They are an amazing mixture of all things awkward.
That question usually makes my teacher heart flutter- oh my gosh, they actually care!
However, there is a time when this questions sends a pit into my stomach.
Unfortunately, the last time I heard this question was one of those times.
About two weeks ago it was a pivotal moment - second quarter was ending, signaling the start of quarter three and therefore, the end of the grading period.
The grade book was closing.
The end was beyond near.
The report cards were being sent out in mere moments.
And...
The students were lining up at my desk - complete and utter panic on their faces.
I adore my 6th graders for more reasons than I can count |more to come on that in the future| but one of the best things about them is that they are SO unapologetically honest. They ask for what they want and they don't sugarcoat it. Unlike adults, their concern is not making something P.C. A group of students knew they wanted a better grade so, gosh darn it, they were going to ask for it.
The other thing that I love about 6th graders is that they have the worst timing possible |as in, oh you are mid-lesson? This is an appropriate time to sharpen my pencils, text my mom, or blow my nose, right?|. Like, you can't get mad at them about it, they just have no experience with what appropriate timing actually looks like yet.
These two endearing qualities |I want what I want whether it is a good time or not| are what lead to the "how can I raise my grade?" question being asked right as I was about to hit "submit" on my finalized grades.
I had no answer to give them except "maybe next time?" |in MUCH kinder, more supportive teacher words of course.|
But, what happens when there is no next time?
You don't have to be any older than 6th grade to know none of us are guaranteed a tomorrow.
My students may not have realized it, as they asked that desperate question that day, but they reminded me of a life lesson I had long forgotten.
We all have fixing to do - broken relationships that need mending, "I'm sorry's" that need accepting, and "it's okay's" that need extending. And more often than not it is easier to pretend these situations don't need dealing with. It is more comfortable, safer, to avoid them - hiding from confrontation and hard conversations that need to be had. Almost as if diverting eye contact from our issues and brokenness will make them disappear. I am convinced this is the approach those students took; thinking "if I ignore all of the missing assignments and low grades they will vanish".
As adults, we hear the 6th grade version of this logic and scoff at the ridiculous nature of it - how can avoiding a bad grade make your grade any better? Yet, we do the exact. same. thing.
How does avoiding the broken relationship with your father, the hurting friendship, or the difficult conversation that needs to be had with a coworker make it any better?
The hard truth is - it doesn't. Being vulnerable, having uncomfortable conversations, and being open does. Not putting off things until tomorrow that need to be dealt with today does.
I want to be able to enter any stage of my life feeling confident; knowing that I
did all that I could, accepted and extended grace whenever possible, and represented Jesus' love in all I did.
I don't know about you, but I don't want to be standing at the teacher's desk asking "how can I fix this?" when time might seem to be running out. I want to squash my fear, allowing myself to put first things first.
As soon as we stop worrying about finding the perfect words and the perfect timing we can, like my phenomenal students, actually start focusing on fixing what's broken. By embracing honesty and authenticity we truly can repair anything our inner 6th grade hearts desire.
Hugs & -ish
JessicaLabels: Middle School, Teacher
